I haven't been able to ignore this thought.

In #psychology, there are different attachment styles:
1. A safe one, where we could count on our parents' attention and support when we were helpless. It builds a positive worldview in us.
2. Anxious, avoidant, and disorganized ones, developed because of our parents’ inconsistency in caregiving. It's because they were too distanced or unpredictable.

All around me, I see avoidant overachievers. Brilliant minds who are not able to trust other people or the organization. It happens even in the most transparent and meritocratic organizations, like ours.

It's easy for me to spot them because I have this curse too. I heard that I was self-sufficient in my childhood, and I remember getting a lot of praise for my achievements.

Sometimes I can also spot the disorganized ones, silently seeking attention but afraid to speak up. Or the anxious ones, seeking safety, afraid of change, and needing a lot of caregiving and explanation not to freak out.

In the old days, I would criticize these as obvious weaknesses. Now I understand it's mundane work of building trust, commitment, and accountability that needs to be done by the middle management. And this needs support and a good example from the top executives.

To sum it up, understanding the basics of attachment styles will help you to spot a human in human... even in the most irrational and irritating situations.

That's why being a leader is hard. Sometimes it feels like conducting an unwanted psychotherapy session.

No wonder my latest hobby is consulting other entrepreneurs as a one-man army. It's so much easier when someone WANTS your help and WANTS to grow, approaching you with trust.

#Trust is the basis of all high-performing teams.